Battles

We walk the daily tightrope between war and peace.
Apparently, I can really ruin his day by cutting his toast, closing a cabinet door, or even standing in the wrong place. The reactions to these infractions are LOUD (poor Grant, he's been exposed to so many more decibels than Henry was at the same age) and escalate very quickly. So I'm choosing my battles. Carefully.

The boy wants to feel like he has choices, like his opinion matters, like he is a big boy (almost 3!?!) He is a big boy. And then again, he's not. It's the struggle to become independent. I can see the writing on the wall, and I think age 3 will be more of a challenge for me than 2 ever was...can I skip ahead to 4?

Current favorites:

car = racecars, and anything that drives fast.

number = 8. it's the only number to set an electric blanket (which, by the way, is hot as blazes!)

outside activity = playing in the snow with his dumptruck

inside activity = playing in the snow with his trucks/cars (yes, bringing snow inside in a bucket can keep him occupied for an hour)

second favorite inside activity = wrestling (I'm not sure how this started, but seems innate among boys)

Grant's world

My little adventurer. He explores every nook and cranny of his world. My bookshelves are cleared daily, windows and mirrors are continually smudged, and big brother's "parking lots" destroyed by this baby-zilla. Grant continues to practice his walking, whether he's holding adult fingers, or pushing the wooden cart. Pat-a-cake is huge right now, and waving bye-bye won't be far behind.

Beating Winter Blues

I found the sweetest book at the library a couple of weeks ago. It is just the thing to beat a few winter blues, which usually hit me very hard in February, but maybe arrived a bit early this year (tired of shivering and shoveling, yet?).

It is also a gentle and timely reminder to be present to our day.  Sometimes, the mundane activities of life (laundry, cooking, dishes, and so on) really drag me down. There is very little I do day to day that gives me much satisfaction as my "to do" list is filled with tasks that are never truly finished. Though, every once in a while, I marvel at this stay-at-home child raising life season of mine. On days where we can walk in our city and simply watch everyday activities minus the hurry, I realize how lucky I am.  I learn, right alongside Henry and Grant, how curb-makers work, how a tree is cut down, or how cicadas shed their skins. It's a special time for us together, and I'm trying to remind myself that these days are numbered.

Here are a few excerpts from the book for you to enjoy. The pictures are fabulous as well. I love seeing the little mouse family act out their winter activities under huge, unique snowflakes. It is written from the perspective of one little mouse asking his mother questions, and daydreaming about the imminent season of spring.

Now It Is Winter

Written by Eileen Spinelli

Will spring ever come?

Will there be black raspberries and cream

in my breakfast bowl?

Blackberries I helped pick?

Ever again?

Yes, there will be 

blackberries and spring.

But now it is winter.

Now there is oatmeal

in your breakfast bowl.

With butter and brown sugar.

So delicious.

Taste it!

Will spring ever come?

Will I roll down steep grassy hills

giggling towards the bottom?

Ever again?

Yes, spring will come

and grass and giggles too.

But now it is winter.

Now you can sail downhill

on your sled

lifted on snowy laughter.

What fun!...

Will spring ever come?

Will the night sky grow pink

and the night breeze whisper...

Hush, child. Hush.

Spring will come all pink sky and breezes.

But now...now it is winter.

Now you are cozy in your flannel pajamas.

And warm in your bed.

Now is good--

as in "goodnight" --

and sweet -- 

as in "sweet dreams."

Now is the blessing.

Now is the time to love.

Now is the time 

to be.

Kids Say...

Over the weekend, we drove to Iowa for a visit.
During the last 15 minutes of the drive, as we turned down the country road, Henry says, "Momma, turn on your lights!"
I say, "my lights are on, it's just dark in the country!"

I love being away from the light pollution of the city.
______________________
A few other favorites:
When he's in agreement, Henry says "very exactly"

If something is messy, it's getting "all everywhere"

Lately, I've been told that "these are my choices"  and when he follows my direction, it's accompanied by a very resigned and deflated "fine"

Dear Santa

oh, am I too late for that?
Well, here's my list, anyway. It's nothing that could have been wrapped and placed beneath the tree, so perhaps there's still time.

I want:
1. a full night's sleep
2. time for myself
3. time with my husband
4. a pony

Actually, I've done a lot of thinking about this list. They actually make good "New Year's Resolutions", though unlike the lofty this year I'm really going to lose weight goals, these are less what "might be nice" and more in the "it's necessary" category.

1. a full night's sleep: actually even 4 hours strung together will suffice. I've currently let go of all the habit changing, effort, and agonizing over why my little lab rat won't sleep if I try this or that. He's with me in bed, or in his own space when he's fidgety. And when I don't get much rest, I will not feel guilty for attempting a nap on the couch while Henry watches a movie.

2. time for myself: this is hard with a non-napper, a young nursling, and a busy husband. There are a couple of approaches. First, I can get back to the Y at some point. It's seriously two birds and one stone. Alone time while I work out.  Though I sometimes contemplate napping in the locker room, I easily forget that exercise can also give me a burst of energy to tackle the end of my day. Secondly, I can hire a babysitter. Which leads me to the next item.

3. time as a couple: [translation]: get a babysitter. Evenings spent sitting next to each other on the couch, each staring at separate laptops does not count as "together time".

4. a pony: Just kidding. Do I sound like I need another living thing to care for right about now?  But it's a matter of perspective. Ever heard the story of the little optimistic girl who greeted her pile of manure under the Christmas tree with the "where's my pony?" question?  I want to look for the pony. So, I'll try. In the daily muck, I'll try. I had pony.

Holiday Rewind

Wow.
We did it.
We saw all our family over Christmas. Near and far. Or rather, far and farther.

From Holidays 2010

We traveled by car, and car, and plane, and car. Overall, the boys traveled very well (except for the second leg of our Boston flight where Grant screamed almost the entire time, no matter what I did -- unless I was nursing him, which I simply can't tolerate for 1 1/2 hours solidly.  Oh, and the HUGE poopy blow out Grant delivered somewhere on I-90 in Chicago, which annihilated his Christmas mass outfit. What a silly mommy, trying to plan ahead. If there are two things Grant should be known for during his infant life, it would be screaming and crying at night, and inopportune poop explosions! George won't be forgetting his adventures in changing these in TINY airplane bathrooms any time soon, and I won't be forgetting what it's like to look into the diaper bag after one of these emergencies and realize I have one lone wipe left, and no change of clothes immediately available. Second time around parent gets too cocky and poorly stocks the diaper bag, apparently. Oh, and curse those bathrooms that don't provide any paper towels, only hand dryers -- I love the earth, too, but seriously, a little help here).

At any rate, we scooted through safe and sound (car seat in tow! -- suffering only  a small scare that we would have a repeat mishap such as the one in 2008, when we arrived sans infant car seat. This time George claimed he saw ours sitting next to the conveyor belt as we pulled back from the jet bridge. We had a moment of desperation with the flight attendant in our sleepy, cranky baby makes cranky parents state. She assured us everything was on board. I was not confident and the fact that it was sitting at the gate when we landed was a true Christmas miracle, in my mind.) in the aftermath of their "snowpacalypse" as I heard it dubbed. Just in time, in my opinion, to have plenty of snow for Henry to play in, minus the travel headaches of delays and cancellations. For us, anyway. This time.

From Holidays 2010

And each and every one of our days of vacation was packed with family time. We then needed a vacation from our vacation. A day of recuperation to hunker down in our house and be cozy. Thankfully, George's return to residency was not a sprint, hit the ground running kind of return, but a gradual increase in duties once again. 

For a day or two around New Year's, I felt hopeful with the fresh, new year and made plans, goals, and had a change in attitude. Then I came down with a terrible, long-lasting, head cold. So I resigned, once again, to survival mode (our standard "run the house doing only the basics" agenda - eat, bathe, try to sleep, clean up what's necessary, like dishes and clothes, but nothing extra). Actually, make that critical survival mode (eat, sleep). I took NyQuil, and was in bed by 8:00pm for a week. And you would think that would have provided me with extra rest. But you would be assuming that I got to stay in bed. The boys continue their nighttime antics of musical beds (Henry in ours, Mama or Papa in Henry's, Grant in the crib, Grant in our bed, Grant in the co-sleeper, etc.) We like variety, apparently. A spice of life.

So, Christmas. When I was younger I couldn't understand why my grandma would say something like "I'm so glad all that Christmas crab is done" (don't ask me about the "crab" word, it was her idiosyncratic term) when, as kids, it was nearly the best time of year. Yet, this year, I would tend to think she's right.

That's the story of our crazy Christmas adventures of 2010. Christmas 2011 might find the Madison Leydons at home.

I hope this doesn't sound horribly grinchy...I'm better now. Honest. I think I suffer from hindsight is 20/20, or short term memory loss or something along those lines.

A photo of Grant and Mommy.  ;)

From Holidays 2010